This post was going to go a little differently. It was probably going to lean a little more toward the woe is me side, but my thoughts have since changed. I had my second official panic attack since this has all started. Last week I received my box of meds. The box was HUGE. I thought surely it was because of the ice packs. No it was because of the bazillion needles it contained. I just kept pulling more and more and more out of the box. BIG ONES. Not just my tiny stomach shots. I knew there would be more meds, but knowing and seeing are two VERY different things. I instantly started sweating and crying. (Did I mention this is just my first shipment of meds? There will most likely be more!Eek!)
I am thankful I had an acupuncture appointment last week. ( I love my acupuncturist, Marty. She is fantastic!) She challenged me to change my thought process about the shots. Right then, I was rejecting them before I had even received them. I didn't want them (I mean who really wants a bunch of big old needles poked in them) I was scared, and to be honest I was a little angry that this is what I have to do to get pregnant. It definitely can feel unfair.
The reality is that I DO want these shots. These shots are the first steps to helping us conceive. I should be welcoming them. (I am going to try really really hard to think that way) (Let's face it, it might be a little tricky when I see Austin headed toward my backside with one of those monster needles.)
I know in my last post I mentioned the beautiful song, my cousin Hope wrote. She was kind enough to allow me to share it. Her words and conviction are powerful and just what I have needed to prepare for what lays ahead of me this month.
CLICK HERE TO HEAR HOPE'S SONG
No comments:
Post a Comment